TimSchreiber.com

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Lydia is now a year old!  We postponed her party a week because she was sick, then I took my sweet time and waited a week to post them.  Enjoy!

(As usual, click the thumbnail image to download the full size (5 megapixel) picture)

From today's freakishly strong hailstorm (for Utah at least)...

Hot Drinks

The label on the cabinet says it's for "Bowls, Hot Drink Cups." This is in the breakroom in the LDS Church building where I work. The Word of Wisdom explicitly forbids "hot drinks:"

9 And again, hot drinks are not for the body or belly (Doctrine and Covenants 89:9)

Big Wiener Deal

Thank goodness I qualify for the discount (nyuck, nyuck)

This morning, I ran late and had to catch TRAX to work instead of my normal express bus. Mistake. I should have just driven in. The train was completely full of high school cheerleaders on their way to Cheer Camp at the University of Utah. I swear I have never before seen so much bottle-blond concentrated in one place. I was like some sort of quantum peroxide singularity.

Twenty years ago, I would have been all over that. Nowadays, I find them disrespectful, annoying, loud, and obnoxious. It's funny what happens to you when you grow up.

Mark my words right now: I would sooner have my man nipples removed and force-fed to me than see Gwen or Lydia become cheerleaders. I'm going to raise them with a love for computers, math, and science instead.

On Saturday, Gwen was sitting at Stacy's computer playing kids games on NickJr.com. All of a sudden, she blurted out “Dammit!”

I spun around angrily and asked “Did you just say a bad word?”

“No, I just said 'Dammit' to the computer,” she matter-of-factly replied.

It's hard to dish out punishment when you're about to bust out laughing. But I have to wonder: where on earth did she pick up the cussing at the computer thing? Oh, nevermind.

Then yesterday before Gwen's bedtime, Gwen, Stacy and I were playing with Play-Doh at the kitchen table. Stacy made a flower, Gwen made a something I couldn't readily identify, and I made a frog. Well, bedtime came, and I told Gwen to clean it all up. A couple of minutes later, I hear “I'm gonna take your arrrrrm – ribbiiiiiiit! I'm gonna take your other arrrrrm – ribbiiiiiiit!!” The “ribits” sounded like the frog was in extreme pain.

Twisted.

By the looks of it, John Inglish, the general manager, is the man. Recent “successes” including the new FrontRunner Commuter Rail line and the new 33rd South Bus Rapid Transit service have thrust him into the spotlight. He'll even be gracing the cover of an upcoming issue of Metro Magazine, the leading public transit industry journal.

But in reality, FrontRunner ridership is lower than projected and the continual route and the schedule changes necessitated by FrontRunner and the 33rd South BRT line have left conventional bus service completely unreliable. And sadly, in his rush to kick his new projects out the door, he is neglecting nearly everything about UTA – especially its overtaxed and underdeveloped service to northern Utah County, the fastest growing area along the Wasatch Front.

For Salt Lake City bound commuters from American Fork, Lehi, Saratoga Springs, Eagle Mountain, and Cedar Valley, there are just nine express buses each direction to get them to and from work, and they are mostly all overcrowded and dangerous, with standing room only. It's been that way for years, and the rising gas prices haven't helped. Repeated pleas by many UTA patrons have gone unanswered, and there appears to be no relief in sight.

By contrast, there are 28 southbound and 24 northbound express buses operating each way between Davis and Weber counties and downtown Salt Lake City, many of which operate nearly empty. And with FrontRunner Commuter Rail servicing the same areas, demand for express bus service is decreasing – so much so that UTA has cut five express buses in each direction. It would seem logical for UTA to reassign those buses to Utah County routes to alleviate the pressure down there, but they're not.

There seems to be a general air of apathy from UTA toward northern Utah County under John Inglish's direction. Saratoga Springs mayor Tim Parker meets with UTA every year; and in his last meeting he was told that even if cities like Saratoga Springs, Eagle Mountain, and Cedar Valley implemented the mandated quarter-cent sales tax increase for public transit, they would still not get UTA service – despite a high level of demand from residents in those communities. Eagle Mountain mayor Heather Jackson is hoping that UTA will eventually listen to northern Utah County communities, but no one is holding their breath (http://www.heraldextra.com/content/view/273528/).

So, the next time you watch the news or read a newspaper or magazine article about how great UTA and its chief dancing monkey, John Inglish, are, just remember those successes are happening because other, arguably more pressing needs are being neglected.

Today, I was working with U.S. Census data to generate random names for a database project I'm developing, and I came across some really interesting information:

Every second, an average of 1.7 people pass away worldwide.  If you've ever grieved over the death of a loved one, just try imagining it happening over and over again about twice per second.

Also every second, an average of 4.3 babies are born worldwide.  If you've ever shared in the joy of a newborn baby, just try imagining it happening over and over again about four times per second.

It boggles the mind.

And now you have just a shallow glimpse into what a loving God must feel watching over us down here.

Source: http://www.census.gov/cgi-bin/ipc/pcwe

Today is my next-to-last day working at the State Health Department, and I'm pretty excited. I'm a little more ambivalent about my next assignment, though: the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Yep, you read that right.

I interviewed there last week, and boy, was it weird! We started off with a word of prayer offered by the interviewer. Then he bore his testimony about the importance of the project they're working on. There were questions about my activity, my callings, and whether or not I had a temple recommend. And finally, he asked me to offer the closing prayer. Quite honestly, I felt as though my career had been violated in some way.

As weird as it is, though, I understand the Church is still a church and conducts its business in, well, a "churchy" way. It's just not something I'm used to. In my prior experience, a potential employer doing any of those above things would certainly end up in a lawsuit of some sort.

I'm sure the Church prefers contract and contract-to-hire placement for that very reason: you can get away with those types of questions and requests with a contractor, and when the time comes to bring someone on permanently, you already know all the information that would be otherwise unobtainable.

I am fortunate that the location at which I'll be working requires only business casual attire, as opposed to the full jacket-and-tie monkeysuits required at the Church Office Building (COB). Also, I'll be working on a pretty cool, hush-hush type project that is more business-oriented than, say, a proselytizing database or whatever.

There are a few things that I need to be perfectly open and honest about, though, so they don't come to anyone's surprise:

• I drink caffeinated soda/energy drinks and am not ashamed of it.
• I listen to NIN and KMFDM, not Janice Crap Perry.
• I use words like hell, damn, crap, ass, and bitch quite liberally in my day-to-day life -- not necessarily in the workplace though.
• I am cynical, opinionated, and not always reverent.
  
• The Church does not define me. It is not the most important part of my life, nor do I desire it to be.
• I will never be a full-time Church employee. Never.

With all that in the open now, I'm almost looking forward to starting on Monday.

Sitting at my desk at the Utah Department of Health this morning, I noticed the smell of burning paper.  A Department of Health employee noticed it, too.  No sooner did she mention it than the fire alarms started going off, and the whole building was evacuated.

My department met at the designated meeting area, and after about 20 minutes, we were let back in the building.  Upon reentry, I noticed the smoke smell had grown stronger and had the more familiar scent of burnt popcorn.

Way to go, dumbass - whoever you are.

Yesterday, I had to pick up my dad at the airport.  He was returning from Utah from a trip to Michigan to visit my sister Karen and her family.  Anyway, because Southwest is notoriously late coming into SLC, I decided to track the last leg of his flight from Denver.  I saw a few sites that allowed me to do that, but one in particular stood out:  floweb.com.  They have a feature that allows you to track flights in Google Earth.

Below is a screenshot of my dad's flight from Denver to Salt Lake (click on the image for a larger view).  The view is from the northwest, with Salt Lake in the lower right and Denver in the upper left.

What does a tech-savvy / money-deficient guy do when he wants HDTV in his bedroom? He can’t go out and buy a $1000 1080p LCD. No, he has to improvise:

I had a Samsung SyncMaster 205 LCD 20” widescreen monitor (1680x1050 resolution) and a set of Roland computer speakers lying around not doing anything, so that was my starting point.

Getting the video to the monitor turned out to be the problem. My very basic, spare Comcast digital cable receiver didn’t have a digital video output, so I looked into the alternatives. S-Video to VGA wouldn’t work – those units are expensive, and their quality is pretty crappy. Then I had the idea to upgrade my outdated receiver for a new HD DVR receiver and use a $30 HDMI to DVI converter to run the digital video to the monitor.

So on Saturday, I went to Comcast and exchanged my old and busted receiver for the new HD DVR hotness. All in all, it cost $30 for the HDMI to DVI converter, plus an additional $6 per month on my cable bill.

My only gripe? I can’t adjust the volume using the remote. I can totally live with that for the price I paid, though.

When money gets tight, we all cut back on our portions and start eating more ramen noodles, but this is a little ridiculous...

CNN: Microscopic ramen bowl believed to be world's smallest

"Mechanical engineering professor Masayuki Nakao said Thursday that he and his students at the University of Tokyo used a carbon-based material to produce a noodle bowl with a diameter of 1/25,000 of an inch."

Only a couple of days after taking Azithromycin (generic Zithromax) for asthmatic bronchitis, I developed a very itchy rash (hives). It started – well – “down there,” but one day later became apparent on my forehead, around my eyes, down my left cheek, behind my ears, and down my neck. Concerned, I went to the doctor again, and sure enough, it was allergic dermatitis. The doctor prescribed Clarinex, telling me to double the dose and take it twice daily. I took the prescription to the pharmacy and had them fill it, but the pharmacy tech told me that my insurance carrier, United Healthcare (UHC), denied the claim.

Because there’s no way I hell I’m going to pay $118 for an frickin’ antihistamine, I stepped away to call UHC and figure out why my prescription was denied. After wading through menu after menu in their phone system, I was able to get through to Latrice, who works in their North Carolina call center. I asked why Clarinex is not covered, and she said it was because there was an “over-the-counter equivalent.” When I asked what it was, she told me she did not have that information. I persisted, saying that if she’s going to tell me my claim is denied because there’s an “over-the-counter equivalent”, she had better darn well back it up and tell me which OTC medication it is. Again, she refused. I asked to speak with her supervisor, and she put me on hold.

While I was on hold, I couldn’t help but wonder why the frick they wouldn’t just tell me what the equivalent is so I can just buy it and be done with it?! Why does everything I do with regard to my health insurance have to be such a pain in the arse?! Then I remembered how United Healthcare harassed me a few months ago in an attempt to avoid paying the sizeable claims from Gwen’s dog bite. Oh yeah, that’s right. Health insurance companies are run by greedy-arse rat b-tards.

After about 20 minutes, Latrice returned and told me “their systems were down” and that she could not transfer me to her supervisor – even though she was apparently able to access the systems just fine when she verified my subscriber information at the beginning of the call (liar liar pants on fire). She suggested I call back in an hour. Yeah right. I told her that was unacceptable and that I required a call back from her supervisor immediately when their systems were back up. She said she could not do that. I told her to write my name and number on a piece of paper and hand it to her supervisor. Again, she refused. 

I was beginning to tire of her insolence and demanded the address to their corporate offices, the complaint department, and the CEO of UHC. She again told me she could not provide the information for the complaint department because their systems were down. How convenient. She did tell me her supervisor’s name was Tasha Monroe yet still refused to provide the CEO’s name or address saying that I need to follow some “chain of command.” In my mind, I was like, “No, sweet cheeks, I don’t have to follow shiat.” Then I ended the call rather abruptly.

Seriously, I tire of all the endless bullshiattery! 

I talked to my doctor’s office, and they said UHC might be confusing Claritin and Clarinex. I spoke with the pharmacist, and he said the same thing, but that the two medications are actually quite different. He suggested that Zyrtec, which was just recent made available over-the-counter, may be quite effective on skin reactions. Okay, whatever, I bought some and was on my way.

I got online a little later and did my own research. As it turns out, the pharmacist was right. I found information on an Allergist’s website that Zyrtec and Zantac taken together are quite effective against skin allergies. I thought Zantac was just for reducing stomach acid, but as it turns out, it’s actually an H2 receptor antagonist antihistamine. When combined with Zyrtec, which is an H1 receptor antagonist, it is said to produce some sort of “synergistic” effect that is greater than either alone. I don't really know what any of that means, but I'm willing to give it a try.

So as it turns out, this whole situation actually caused me to stumble upon a better treatment. But that is still no excuse for the behavior exhibited by United Healthcare. Even though it will probably do me about as much good as would spitting into the wind, I am writing a scathing letter and sending it to the CEO and five other top-level executives at UnitedHealth Group. I will post the letter, along with any responses or lack thereof.

Of course, I do not expect anyone at United HealthGroup to take this seriously.  Why would they? According to Forbes.com, CEO Stephen J. Hemsley makes between $4 million and $8 million per year; and you bet your arse he doesn’t pay a dime for medical services. So why the frick would he give a shiat about someone having to pay $118 for a bottle of pills?

Anyway… enough ranting for now. There will be more to follow.

Gwen completed all the requirements to advance to the rank of Little Ninja White Belt with Orange Stripe. Her Grammy was able to attend the ceremony, and Gwen got to show off her punches, kicks, forms, and other exercises with the older competition “SWAT” team.

During one exercise, she was accidentally kicked in the mouth by another kid. She cried for just a couple of minutes, but then ran back out onto the mat to finish. When I had a look at it later in the evening, it looked like a couple of her teeth were knocked a little loose (not bad) and bled a little. Heck, if it would have been me, I wouldn't have gone back out there. She is one tough little girl, I'll tell you.

Finally, she received her belt and certificate, and afterward, she got to pick where we went out to dinner to celebrate. Her choice? IHOP (again).

Congratulations, Gwen!!!

Here's some pictures of the girls playing around and having fun.  Enjoy!

Over the past 30 days, I have received an average of 56 SPAM emails every day. When compared with an average of seven legitimate emails per day over the same time span, it means that I get eight times more SPAM than legitimate emails… And that includes the recent email fwd flood that my friend Tyler sent out.

Good thing Gmail’s spam filtering is so good. I never once saw a single SPAM message in my inbox. So, if you’ve got a SPAM problem in your inbox, I’d suggest signing up for a Gmail address. It’s free, and its SPAM filtering is the best in the business. 

They even have free Gmail solutions for your own domain name. You can have your address be yourname@yourdomain.com, and still benefit from the robust SPAM filtering. I’ve set it up for a couple of companies, including Stacy’s employer, Plaza Cycle.

Police say drunk driver killed cyclist in crash
boston.com
MARSHFIELD - Gary Sanborn pedaled his bike in the dark along Route 139, the price he had to pay after pleading guilty to four drunken driving offenses and having his license revoked. In a sad twist, Sanborn died while riding his bicycle Tuesday night, struck by a pickup truck whose driver, police say, was drunk.

Gwen started playing Soccer this month with her next-door friend. It's comical to see a bunch of 4-year-olds "playing" soccer. Here's a couple of pictures I snapped with my phone during their first practice.